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“Watermelon Baby”

October 26, 2009

When I was a little boy my mother always warned me not to swallow watermelon seeds. The reason was simple, if I did a watermelon would  begin to grow in my little boy belly. Of course my mother also told me that I shouldn’t swallow gum because it would stick to my ribs.

Unfortunately for me it turned out my mother was wrong about one of these two things. Unfortunately a certain little boy had a watermelon baby problem on his hands. What’s worse is he couldn’t tell his mother that he had swallowed all of the seeds in his watermelon slice because that would mean he had disobeyed, or perhaps even worse, disregarded his mother.

I was pregnant, with a watermelon baby. This was something I had to hide like a teenage girl that decided to keep it. Luckily for me my clothes had become baggy due to the lack of food I had not been eating. I couldn’t eat. I just plain didn’t have the room.

How this pregnancy would end plagued my mind. I was, after all, a little boy. That is to say, what exactly was the exit strategy of this thing? Finally, I had to tell my mother.

Upon doing so my watermelon baby problem was over as she simply beat it out of me.

The………………………………………………………………………………….End.

Moral of the story:  Obey your Mother, children.

 

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